Adventure

My alarm goes off at 8:00 AM, this is sleeping in for me now. Get up, shower, make breakfast. My Saturday morning church service of worship music and listening to The Garden’s pod cast, Pastor Bill teaching on sloth. Church takes place as I do all the dishes from the previous week. So much silverware. My first day with this new deodorant, it smells very manly. I hop on the piki and head to TOA. Go into my office, check Facebook, email and change blog interface (do you like it?). I go outside to play with the kids. Sam smells my armpit while sitting next to me and says “Baba, you are wearing perfume.” I teach the English word ‘cologne’ and explain its my new deodorant. Chapati and beans for lunch. Show Benny some things on the guitar. Let the older kids on the computers while I work in my office. Lyd comes up and we go to balance the books for March. Expected time to do so, 20-30 minutes. After two hours, my new deodorant is adding to my headache. After a few hours, Jodie comes in with a problem. Awadhi is out of his meds and we might have to go to his school and it is already turning into dusk. If they go, I go, because its not the best place to go after dark and its been raining. I wait. Turns out they don’t go and I don’t leave TOA till 6:40. I take my laundry home in my basket and it blocks my headlight. Too dark to wear my shaded sunglasses while I drive. Bug flies in my eye. Try not to eat it in the mud. Get home. The new tenants’ dog won’t stop barking at me. I pray this big German Shepherd doesn’t get to brave and bite me. He settles for disrespectfully peeing on my piki. I come inside, turn on Amos Lee, cut the mold off the last of my cheese and fry up another salami quesadilla. Resign to writing for the night. Adventure?

A couple days ago, I was IMing with a friend from Long Beach. He asked me if I had anything exciting to share. I told him that things that used to seem exciting to me were now just normal. A response also known as ‘no.’ He asked me if we’d been dealing with any persecution. As an aside, I know where my friend’s question came from as he was a part a prayer meeting for me where that was spoken of. I won’t get into it right now, but I’m quite certain that in my walk I will come into considerable persecution. His question came from that mindset, but the truth is I haven’t really been experiencing any yet. Boy, that’d make for a riveting blog.

Adventure is important to me. Anyone whose ever read this blog since I started it can see that the same tag line has been on it the whole time “tracking Brandon and all his adventures throughout Moshi, Tanzania with his Treasures of Africa.” Is that accurate? Have you been reading my blogs and thinking “wow, look at the adventures Brandon is having with his Treasures of Africa!”? Probably not. I wish that I could chalk it up to my self-effacing writing style, but the truth is, this “adventure” looks different than I would have thought.

What is adventure? When I think of adventure, I get this mental picture of Indiana Jones running away from this huge stone ball and narrowly escaping yet again. Is that the standard for adventure? I’m not a tomb raider. I’ve never even met one. There has to be some other standard to say that this is living adventurously and this is living domicile. I don’t know what it is though. When you think about all the ways that people live its hard to discern what is true adventure and what isn’t. What about a person that is always climbing mountains, hang gliding and skydiving, but he’s never been in love and is insecure, is he living an adventure? What about a guy who used to have these aspirations of changing the world and now is working a normal job married with a couple kids, is he living an adventure? Better yet, how about a guy that will be 24 on Thursday, who just followed God to Africa, but his experience is different than he expected? Adventure? Sijui.

Bill Dogterom was preaching on sloth and he talked about how we are made for adventure and to sail the seas of life. I agree, both from experience and from knowing that disagreeing with Bill is second to disagreeing with the Lord. By the grace of the Spirit, sloth seems so unattractive to me, because I want to experience life that is really life. Even if that means I fall on my piki in the mud or get a broken heart every now and then.

So is this adventure? I daresay that I think it is. Everything else aside, I say it is for one reason. I may not be riding rhinos to work or getting beat up by Masai warriors everyday. I may not be taking the gospel into some remote South American tribe or hiding out with my underground church in the Bhutan. But there is this critical factor of risk. Adventure is completely dependent on risk. There is nothing more valuable to risk than love. I can objectively say that I risked love to be here. I loved my friends and family in the states. I still do love them, of course. However, in a normal pattern of thinking, you might gather that me moving to the other side of the earth will severely limit the growth of love in every single relationship. Not that love won’t grow still, but it won’t be as much or as quick if I’d been sitting down with you and experiencing life at your side. I risked that true love. Even more so I risked not having the truest form of human love that I’ve ever experienced as being here meant not being with a person that I loved in the most unique fashion.

So there’s the risk. Praise God that my risk was not out of foolhardiness and thrill chasing in East Africa, but rather it was based in His calling me here. Since it is in His will, I have a 100% chance of reaping greater benefits (love) than I risked. I’ve always loved the kids that I worked with in California. I risked and gave them up and have experienced a hundred-fold (no exaggeration) in the love that I have for the Treasures. That takes nothing away from my love for those kids in the states, but the Lord has taken me to a new level. I risked my love for the relationships with friends and family. Praise God that those are still maintainable from here, though more limited. My friend base here is…developing, nonetheless there are certainly a handful of people that I am developing deep relationship with. And that risk of being with that special woman, I honestly believe that the Lord hasn’t forgotten that and when I’m with whoever I’m supposed to be with, it too will be an immeasurable increase because of His faithfulness.

The greatest adventure is abiding in the Spirit and allowing Him to lead you. Don’t fear, He is with you and will uphold you. Let go of what control you think you have and dive in expecting the unexpected. It’ll be beautiful, pinky promise.

--------------------------------------------------------

The Rundown: The first week of the kids’ break went very well. We’ve had time for all the things that I mentioned last week. They are big fans of English Verb Bingo for the ESL time. I’ve taught them a couple songs as well which is my favorite thing. On Friday, I took the fourth graders and up for a nice long walk to the grocery market and treated them to ice cream. That was a lot of fun. I have really been able to make some deep connections with the boys especially. We have some great conversations and laugh together a lot. The books have been a serious headache. Pray that Lydia and I can figure stuff out before a bunch of transactions are made on Monday. Its Easter and that’s crazy how fast its come up. He is risen! I didn’t bring any pastel shirts. We’ll be eating a nice tall goat. My birthday is this week. I will be 24. Does 23 start my mid-twenties or is it 24? One way or another I’ll certainly be in my mid-twenties on Thursday. Haya, inatosha.

TOA Video Made By AIM Short Termers

treasures of africa. from chelsea kim on Vimeo.

My Kids

I have a wonderful calling. Praise God. I’ll try not to brag, but I love my life, I love my “job,” I love my family. I have wonderful kids, you should meet them. I don’t love not seeing so many loved ones in the states, I don’t love many aspects of living in Tanzania and I don’t love not having In’n’Out, Wahoo’s, Chipotle, microwaveable food, or good old mom’s cooking, but I moved here for a reason and I love that.

Its easy to get bogged down in things and lose focus on the ‘why’ of all those menial things. I do them because I love my kids. I get headaches doing the books, I get frustrated with the ultra bureaucratic government and I miss so much of my Californian culture and all the bells and whistles it has, but you know what? Its all worth it. It is absolutely worth it.

Yesterday the Adventures in Missions short termers came to TOA one last time. Before they left, they pulled Lydia, Jodie and me aside just to say thank you, give us a gift and pray for us. One of them, Halley, talked about how out of all the places she’s been, Tanzania has been her favorite and that was TOA was a big reason for that. Lydia told them thank you for coming and seeing how amazing our kids are. She said we already know they’re amazing, so thanks for coming and seeing too. I was like, yeah, our kids are amazing. And yeah, they’re our kids, which means they’re my kids.

The Lord did something special for me and put a passion in me for these kids. And I thank Him so much for that. Its been almost two years since I first came to Tanzania and to Treasures of Africa. Do you know how many foreigners, especially Americans, have come through TOA during that time for short term trips, visits and the like? A lot. Like a lot a lot. Do you know how many went on to move here and/or work here? One.*1 Thank you, Jesus for Your favor. The kids have forgotten the majority of those people, but they know, like really know, their Baba Brandon, or Baba Bran, or Baba Bra, or Baba Ben, or my personal favorite, compliments of Maria, Baba Ben-ooo. (As common as Brandon is in the states, it kills the Tanzanian tongue.)

I first came on a team in 2008, not unlike these AIM short termers that just left. Everyone on that team fell in love to one degree or another with one child or another or several. I fell in love with Awadhi first and went on to fall in love with the others as well. Those friends are great and I still stay in contact with some of them, but they haven’t been back, for one reason or another. (Although I am looking forward to a couple of them coming back to Moshi soon). And that's totally fine, the Lord's been doing other things with them, but I couldn’t not come back. I had to be with my kids. I told Ryan before I left that I would be back the next year for a longer time. By God’s grace, that happened. And even more by God’s grace, He led His servant Rita to offer me a position at TOA and in the words of John Madden… BOOM! I see my kids everyday.

For several years now, I’ve worked with kids. When I was previously working for the city more than anywhere else, I called the kids at Victoria Elementary, where I worked Monday through Friday, “my kids.” But I also had “my kids” at Rock Harbor, “my kids” at Pacific Pointe, eventually “my kids” at The Garden and Precious Lambs and so on. Those kids were so great and I miss many of them. This is a whole new level though. I see these kids everyday. They call me “father.” I can pick them up and hug, kiss and cuddle and no parent is going to come in and file a lawsuit. Why? Because they are MY kids.

I love hearing Lydia, Eli and Jodie tell stories about the kids and praise God, I’ve begun to build up my own repertoire. Over dinner on Monday, I was able to tell a couple stories of the kids in the preschool and it was really nice to just have our guests attention as they were so into hearing about my kids. What dad doesn’t love to tell stories about his kids? In my natural mind, I think about how I just got here, I didn’t get to know the kids well from short term trips and I’ve missed most of their lives. I couldn’t possibly know them and what kind of dad is only “getting to know” his kids? But the truth is that my dad has known me for nearly 24 years and does he know me completely? No. He knows me, but he’s still getting to know me. That’s where I am with my 26 kids, I know them and I’m getting to know them. You want to know how well I know them?

I know that Lucy has the cutest dimples in the world and in spite of all the words she doesn’t know in English, she does know “dimples.” I know that Innocent will cross you up if you’re playing soccer against him. I know Moses will change the world. I know that Margaret has a unique and beautiful voice and I appreciate her leading in worship. I know that Tina has no shame in farting on me as she sits on my lap. I know that Jerry is cute, funny, sweet and when all else fails he picks up the “creepy kid” slack. I know that Maria emphasizes things in the cutest way. I know that Benny is a young man of integrity and is picking up guitar very fast. I know that Witness is shy at first, but as you get to know her she has an amazingly sweet spirit. I know that Maggie is in second grade and already needs deodorant. I know Sam is capable of messing up and doing something stupid, but has even more capacity to follow the Lord be used by Him. I know that Justina is the funniest kid that I’ve ever met and you will not cease laughing once she becomes comfortable with you. I know that when Zoe is scared or hurt, she’ll come and crawl up in my arms. I know that Antoni mumbles. I know that Doreen has a very caring and affectionate personality. I know that Diamond has the most delightful laugh and does it far more than the average child. And so on.

Yeah, and then there’s Awadhi. We’ll just say that I know him.

It may look different traditionally, but I’m a father. By God’s grace, I have kids. I keep pictures of them on my iPod (they don‘t all fit in my wallet). I talk about them when they’re not around. I write about them in blogs to people who’ve never met them. I pray for them. I hug them. I joke with them. I laugh with them. I died to a great life in California to be with them because I love them. Praise our Father for His kindness towards me. Thank you Lord.


*1 Warren and Christina were here for a year, but I don’t know if they came on a short term trip previously. Since Autumn, the Lord has kept them in the states for family reasons. Yay I get to be business manager!

----------------------
The Rundown: I always think of things to update people on throughout the week and when I sit down to write, I just say “the week is good, that’s all.” Alright, Brandon, think, give the people some meat. Hmm… oh yeah! I killed a lion on Wednesday! … no, I didn’t. I live in Africa and I’ve never killed a lion, I’m so not legit. Well, it is rain season. Yesterday as I was driving home, my piki got stuck in the mud. Luckily, I was close to my house and my guard Dao saw me so he came and helped me get it out. Last Friday, Lydia and Jodie got me tortillas and salsa from Arusha and I’ve been enjoying quesadillas the last week. Its so great! I put salami in them and I don’t know if that’s normal, but it’s the closest to Mexican food I get around here. The AIM team did leave and my first time being the long term missionary around the short term missionaries was a pleasant experience. I’ll miss them, especially because they were my age and that was really my first time hanging out with a group of people close to my age since I left Long Beach. They’re off to Asia. The next two weeks, all the kids will be out of school so I’ll be ultra busy doing extra English, computer, art and music on top of all the normal preschool, English and bookkeeping stuff. Pray for me and more importantly pray that we make the most of our precious time with the kids. I went to Pastor Mbasha’s church today and it was so good to be back there with baba and his congregation. I never cease to be amazed at the beauty of their worship there. When I was sharing greetings and testimony, I was able to speak in Swahili as well and they were pretty excited to hear a mzungu speaking their language. Also today, the new family moved into the new house, I had met the man, Herbert, last Sunday but now they’re all moving in. They seem very nice and I look forward to getting to know them. Alright, that’s it.

Answered Prayers

Like most things in my life here, my spiritual life has been flipped upside down and I’m searching for categories to place things. As if prayer weren’t hard enough to understand as it is, just focusing during times of prayer now has become one of the most elusive things for me to accomplish during my quiet times. And despite my own distractions and inability to “speak the right words” to Him, prayer is still a two way street and I’m seeing more and more how the Lord makes sure to hold up more than His side of the exchange.

My first night in my house here was one marked by prayer. I was pleased to come in and see my house furnished with borrowed furniture, but there was no bed yet and no mosquito net. I pulled the cushions off the couch and placed them on the floor in my living room to go to sleep. January is the middle of summer here, so it was a bit hot, so I slept in my normal attire of shorts and no shirt. Little did I know that I was about to be engaged in warfare. Prayer. Warfare. You know what comes next… I got LIT UP by mosquitoes. I started putting on more and more clothes, pulling my hood all the way over my face to the point where all that was somewhat exposed were my hands and that was unintentional as I was asleep. The Bible says that our tongue has the power to both bless and curse. In high school I had a potty mouth from time to time, but I was literally cursing these mosquitoes, like telling them to just die. I was laying there just praying that God would just kill these stupid useless mosquitoes. Well, He didn’t kill them and the next morning I woke up with about ten to fifteen bites on each hand and also got a bit on my ankles.

Its kind of interesting to think about prayer. We can pray in faith and expect results, but that doesn’t make life easy and after one problem is solved, another one pops up. I don’t know what to make of this necessarily, but often I say in my prayer “Lord, it would be good if __________, because ________” like “Lord it would be good if this stupid internet would just be fast enough so that I can get this stupid YouTube video to upload, because then people back in the states can see what our kids are up to and they might pray for us or donate.” Sometimes, the video uploads, sometimes it doesn’t. I think it would have been good for me to not get attacked and have an ultra itchy hand the next day after sleeping in my house that night, but it didn’t happen. Perhaps there is a level of vanity too something like YouTube videos and mosquito bites, but all the same, doesn’t God want to do good things?

I don’t claim to have any answers to why those things don’t happen and I don’t know how this whole prayer thing works. The Lord will accomplish His will on earth. He does it through our prayers and actions. But He doesn’t “need” us necessarily, He chooses to use us. But if we don’t do our part, He makes up for it. Sometimes we pray and nothing happens. Sometimes we pray one thing and the opposite thing happens. Sometimes we pray and exactly what we prayed for happens. I remember talking about prayer in youth group and I remember my youth pastor saying, “when you pray, God either says ‘Yes,’ ‘No’ or ‘Wait’” At the time that seemed so profound to me, now looking back I think about what happens if one of my kids asks me for something, what do I say, ‘Ndiyo,’ ‘Hapana’ or ‘Subiri’ (sometimes I say ‘labda’ but I don’t think God says that). Wow, okay that’s helpful then.

You all ready to hear some truth? The Lord DOES hear our prayers. It does make a difference. When we pray, things shift in Heaven and Earth and good stuff happens. We don’t understand it completely, but that’s okay. Stop and think about what you are doing… you are speaking with a transcendent infinite being who created the universe and loves you like a father… are we expecting to understand that? What’s more than that is that the Lord does answer our prayers and when He does He has a flawless record of coming through on His word. I am writing this in Tanzania, because the Lord answered my prayer and I thank Him for that.

On Wednesday, Lydia and I met together to just talk about how my first month and a half of actual work at TOA has gone and what things we can be doing and working on and everything. I had a meeting with my incredibly godly boss essentially. We of course talked the technical stuff of work detail. But I was also telling her how grateful I am for her and Jodie and Eli. She went on to return the gratitude and she told me that I am specifically an answer to prayer. It took a special grace for her to do the books and seeing the kids (especially the little ones) learning English has been something critical to running this place, but it was outside of her ability because of everything else that needed to get done. She prayed that someone could come and do these things and the Lord sent me here. The Lord orchestrated something beautiful. Three years ago, three women came here and started an orphanage. That summer, the Lord first called me here and I soon thereafter found out about this place specifically. It soon became a prayer of mine that the Lord release me to come here and start down the path of running an African orphanage. Lydia was the Education Director who became interim Program Director who went back to be Education Director who went back to interim Program Director who became permanent Program Director. Ryan and Stacy came through during that time. For a year in there, a man named Warren came here and fixed the booking system. All this stuff was happening here and I was in California praying that the Lord would release me here. Then in a beautiful moment, Rita offered me a position at TOA and after answering the prayers for a children’s pastor in Long Beach, I returned here and the culmination of many prayers took place. Wow.

One more story…

My senior year of college, I took 40 units altogether so that I could graduate on time with no outstanding units. Because my school schedule was so strenuous, I had to drastically cut back on my hours working at the city. That didn’t mean that my cost of living went down though, so I had to pay for things with my credit card. After I graduated and started working more regularly, I went back to mostly using debit, but I wasn’t really able to make much of a dent in the credit card payment as I was paying back my loans and rent and food and everything else. I stopped using it eventually, but couldn’t pay more than the minimum most months. I prayed and fasted for my financial situation. I dared to pray that the Lord would pay off all my debt (credit card and loans) within a year of my graduation. I only told Clesi and Ashley up til right now, but I prayed, gave generously regularly, and fasted asking the Lord to pay off all my debt before May 2009. The evening of April 30th, Ash and I were literally on top of Triangle Square in Costa Mesa looking through planters for $50,000. Didn’t find anything. So did the Lord just not hear our prayers, not see the fasting? I don’t think so. In the words of my wise youth pastor I think He just said, “wait.” This week, an answer came to $3,500 of my debt. In an act of submission to the Spirit and joyful generosity, a friend of mine has taken over the remaining balance of my credit card. A friend who is already an AMAZING supporter of mine and already had a great impact on me while I was living in California. This friend is a beautiful answer to my prayers and I trust the Lord has something special for them.

Pray. He hears you. He loves you. He has good things for you. If you are discouraged in your praying, ask the Holy Spirit to do His work of encouragement. I stand in the blessed prayers of yesterday and I hope that the next season bears wonderful fruit that I prayerfully sow today.

-------------------------------------------

The Rundown: This week has been good. Last Sunday I helped Lauren move some stuff for another missionary and after that I swam with her and Ronda at their place. Its just nice to hang out with friends and I’m blessed that they were both my roommates over the summer. Monday, I was over at Lydia and Jodie’s for dinner. They are not only hospitable but the food is BOMB! Wow, chicken pot pie with mashed potatoes and gravy. Its like I’m back in the states. I’ve been able to hang out with those short termers a few time so that’s been cool. Discipleship was good on Tuesday, small group was good on Wednesday and worship was really good on Thursday. Yeah, other than that not too much going on. Emails, messages and comments always welcome