Trust

Basically at any moment after Sunday, my spirit (if not my “material”) seemed ready to sit down and write a post. Sunday, I’m resting it and its only been a few days since my last post. Monday, I skype with Melissa and goes a little long and there’s not enough time. Tuesday, I say tomorrow. Wednesday, I skype with Melissa again then come home and opt to clean instead. I plan on Thursday for sure until Lauren asks if I want to lead worship at their house, I go with that. Then today comes, Friday. Alright, now I’m at the computer and I’m more than ready. After all that’s happened today, I’m so ready.

You know I really like receiving feedback on my writing. Of course you know that, I complain about it constantly. My apologies, but let me explain myself further. It encourages me to hear from people, believe it or not I enjoy interaction with people in the states (go figure, I moved here nonetheless). At any rate, I received a good encouraging feedback message from a friend that I met at Vanguard. Rodrigo was certainly not a guy that I figured was reading any of my posts but nonetheless he hit me up with some encouraging words. Besides saying the normal courtesies like “you’re doing a good job,” “you write well,” and “you’re basically C.S. Lewis reincarnated” (okay, I’m fabricating a little), he gave a sound word that has certainly given me a mind frame for the last week. He shared a story about Mother Teresa and out of it encouraged me to just trust. Clarity and figuring out the how of things won’t get me close to where trust in God will. Obviously that’s a good word and after all that was on my mind last week, it was much needed.

Fighting

I find myself in an interesting spot of my life and an interesting spot of my first year on the missionary field. Its quite unique and I can honestly say that I’ve never been in any situation like this one.

The Lord has done an incredible amount of drastic life changing experiences over the last two months. As I sat at my house in February, March and April writhing from loneliness some of the time, I dreamed about all that would take place over the coming summer. Ryan would have all these teams come out and more importantly his interns; I would have a group of friends actually close to my age. Eventually, Melissa was on board to come out and help at Global-EFFECT and that led to a whole new level of dreaming, knowing that she was feeling called to TOA and could potentially be that one woman I’ve been waiting for. Then the second half of May came, the NMC team came with my friend Tyler, then the VU team with my friend Denny and the first intern Dalila, then Nick and Taylor came out, then the Lord put India on my heart, then Melissa and Kelli came, then I realized the magnitude of what God was doing in my relationship with Melissa, then I got engaged (a month ago today), then Melissa left, then I left for Asia, then I had an amazing and anointed time there. And now I’m back. The summer is so officially over, its not funny at all.

India and the Himalayas in Pictures

A few pictures from our time in India and the Himalayas. For more pictures check out my Facebook or the Facebook albums of Noah and Katie Jenks, Lauren Edens and Ryan Helbling (all I did was steal their pictures). Enjoy!

Ministering to Pastor Claude

Indian Roadway

Darjeeling

Me, Noah and Ryan with Sulai and Pastor Claude

A city nestled into the Himalayas

A Buddhist Temple

A Buddhist Temple on the cliff of a mountain

Process

After a crazy time getting back to Moshi, I’m back in Moshi. I find myself writing from within my own living room but in some ways I still feel like I’m back in Asia. Maybe it’s the fact that I’m listening to Jesus Culture or that I have another stomach ache complete with vomit tasting hiccup burps (just thought I‘d share), but I truly feel like there’s a part of me that came alive there and I’m trying to figure out how that looks like in my blessed normal context of Moshi. It is a bit to process.

My trip was amazing. God did new things in my life and I feel like I grew a lot. Its kind of an odd feeling. While I can articulate some of the stuff that He did (at least enough for eight previous blogs in addition to this one), I feel like the heart of what He did and my feelings towards the trip are beyond diction. That seems to be a recurring theme in my life, not having the words. Quite the quandary for someone who fancies himself a writer. What God does is beyond words and such was the case on this trip. Nonetheless, here’s my feeble attempt…

Life is all about the first and second greatest commandment. That we love God and love others (Matthew 22: 37-40). I love God more after this trip and I thank Him that He is here with me in Tanzania as well. I thank God that He is omnipresent and that while we left Asia, He stayed there and came with us. And yet, no one else came back with me. I do miss walking around Darjeeling or seeing the beauty as our tour bus winded through the Himalayas. But more than anything I miss the people. The ministry takes place before the Lord and is for the benefit of the people.

Himalayas Post #3 - The Gospel

Written on September 6th, 2010

Romans 1:16: “For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ, for it is the power of God to salvation for everyone who believes, for the Jew first and also for the Greek.”

We had moved on to the second hotel in another city that we were staying at and had the night free so we spent time together as a team. This was our third night in this nation, but only our first time meeting since we arrived. We were sharing about the times that we’ve had in intercession for and interaction with the people thus far. I shared what the Lord had been doing in my life over the last couple days and was encouraged by what the others were sharing. In particular, Noah and Katie shared about a young woman that worked at the previous hotel who they found out was a believer, secretly for the most part. They shared about their conversation with her and how she came to their room and they were able to pray over her. A conversation ensued in which I said something that just came out of my mouth without me thinking about it, but just resounded as truth in my soul: “When the Gospel is pure, it is unstoppable.”

Its quite an incredible thought to realize the impact that the Gospel has had on this world over the last 2000 years. It truly is the good news that has allowed millions upon millions of people to live a life that is satisfying, purposeful and full of love. The message is simple enough. Because of our shortcomings and sins, God, who is love, made and executed a divine plan for us to be reconciled to Him. He sent His beloved Son to come to Earth and pay the price for all of our sins through His crucifixion. Because He was without flaw and both God and Man, His sacrifice was sufficient for all of our sin. By the power of God, He overcame death and sin with one victorious resurrection and showed us the way to be fully human. An age old story, and ever refreshing as it is truly the best story ever written.

Himalayas Post #2 - Truth

Written on September 3rd, 2010

So many people in this world are seeking after truth. Surely, there are many, like so many in the west, that have given up on the search, saying that such findings are unattainable. So many of them have gotten discouraged, because as soon as they believe they’ve found truth, someone else contradicts and says that it is wrong. At best, many people have resorted to living by “what’s true for you.” However, in light of very simple logic and the very nature of all that is, that can’t be true. If what you say opposes what I say, one of us must be wrong. Indeed, we could both be wrong, but we can’t both be right. I am aware that such logic falls on deaf ears in a post-modern world, but it is valid nonetheless. Many a philosopher and theologian, much wiser and more articulate than me, have wrestled with the big questions of how did we get here and what do we do now. Here’s a portion of my attempt…

You’ll have to forgive me, I have no intent of being politically correct or soft on what I’ve found to be true in this post. You can try to see my perspective and realize that if I didn’t believe it was true in its entirety, what would be the point of believing it in the first place? My position towards anybody referred to in this post is love. Sometimes love includes sharing of truth. My unbelieving friends, whom I love, may prefer another post on something like social justice, like I’ve done in the past. That is an important part of living out the Gospel and being a part of God’s Kingdom. But its not enough, we must also share eternal truths that we’ve found. I can become a father to an orphan, but if I never tell my son the truth of the Gospel, I’ve only blessed him a little in this life time and profit him nothing for eternity.

So let’s get at the truth… While so many others have given up on truth, I truly admire the search of the people in the nations that we’ve been in for the last couple weeks. To be sure, we’ve met with and been able to encourage my brothers and sisters in the church that Christ is building up here. However, these two countries are largely ruled by Hinduism and Buddhism.

Himalayas Post #1 - Intentional

Written on September 2nd, 2010

We’ve safely arrived in the second country after spending about 14 hours driving here. The trip was exhaustingly long, but I was able to get a little sleep, listen to music, and finish a book then start a book. Nonetheless, by the time we rolled up to our hotel at 7:45 PM, we were ready for the day to be over. We walked into the lobby and were all taken back by how incredibly nice the hotel looked. We were all the more blown away when we got to our rooms. The girls had a laugh as I was the first to my room and was exclaiming out loud at how “legit” this place was and it was truly “off the chain” as I said. This place has free wireless internet, each room has a big Hi-Def TV, all the nice amenities that you would expect with furniture and the like. The tissue box is wrapped up like a Christmas gift for crying out loud. I can’t remember the last time I was in a nice hotel. After waking up at 3:30 in the morning and traveling all day, I was ready for a shower.

I was in the shower that had perfect temperature and water pressure and I was washing my hair with actual shampoo and conditioner for the first time in a week and a half and just enjoying the moment. I decided to release a worship song over the room and began singing. As I was in the shower I felt the Holy Spirit saying “don’t forget why you’re here.” The following thought that came to my mind was “I should sleep on the ground tonight.” I realized that the accommodations were not going to help, but rather detract, from my intercession. It was a quick thought in my mind when I first walked into the room that this could serve as a nice vacation from my work at TOA. “I’m a missionary in Africa, I can do it up here. I’ve earned it.” Such thoughts must go by the wayside when wanting to serve the Lord. Entitlement has been something that has strangled so much Christ-like life out of the American church. This life is so beautiful; the walk, the death, the resurrection, the ascension. We can follow Christ in all these things, but we get the life mixed up when we equate blessing with worldly prosperity. We must realize that the Lord’s ways are not that of the world’s, so true joy comes not from monetary affluence or comfort but rather from loving and obeying Jesus. There is nothing wrong with a comfortable bed, I in fact own one back in Moshi. But rather, if my highest calling is to love God and Jesus says the way you love Him is to obey Him (John 14:23) I must relinquish anything that would distract me from doing just that. So I gave up a comfortable bed so that I can focus on obeying Him in praying and interceding on behalf of this nation.

Sounds strange right? Have you read the actions of people in the Bible and realized the Bible heroes are indeed full of weirdos? I know that this is something I’ve mentioned before, but its worth mentioning again. Not merely as a defense of my seemingly useless action in sleeping on the floor, but rather so that we all remember that God does things that look quite strange to the natural eye. That’s why we aren’t to focus on the things that are seen, but rather those that are unseen (1 Corinthians 4:18).