Poetry

Friday night I was kicking it at my house and I began to go through all the previous blogs that I’ve written since December. Maybe its vanity, but I really like going back reading things that I’ve written. It reminds me of where I was when I wrote it, it brings back the emotions, the thoughts, events, the whole deal. I am very blessed by the ability to write and articulate life and I was quite encouraged the other day when my mom told me that my writing is “poetic.”

And yet I’m a little worried. I used to write poetry. I guess I can say that I write poetry, but I haven’t lately. My fear is that I’ve traded in my poetry for prose (does blogging qualify as prose?). Yes, I want my prose to be “poetic,” but I would rather just write poetry. As I’ve gone into writing songs and prose, I’ve been losing my roots.

Roots. I can’t say that “poetry” is necessarily my roots, not just poetry. I am quite indebted to hip hop. My first memory of hip hop, was at my house on L Street in San Miguel. My Junior High best friend Baldo came over and I turned on my radio. I had it on Sly 96 Alternative Rock. He asked me why I didn’t have it on Kiss 99.7 (before it evolved into Wild 106) Hip Hop and R&B and I made some lame excuse and changed it over. We went about our business and soon he left, but I left it on the airwaves. My dad came in and 2Pac was on, he heard it and told me that that is not music I should be listening to, I was officially hooked. Even now, to get in the mood, I got my favorite album on, Black Star. Hard to believe this album is over 10 years old already. “The fire’s in my eyes and the flames need fannin’” [Insert head nod here] So my first poems, weren’t Shakespeare, Frost and Dickinson inspired (that came later), but rather Nas, Method Man, and Mos Def.

Poetry. I decided a couple months ago that if I was going to start writing poetry again, I needed to get back into the culture and get inspiration by reading it first. I got a book and have been enjoying the poems, but the pen hasn’t touched the pad yet. I wrote a song while I was at language school, but that is different from poetry and spoken word. The last few days I’ve just been praying the Lord will give me the opening line, if I get that, I’ll just take off. We’ll see.

Sorry, this blog isn’t really about Tanzania or the kids so much. This is what I’m thinking though. The Lord gave me words, I’m no Robert Frost, I’m no C.S. Lewis, I’m just Brandon and this is what I enjoy. This is my art form. I want my poetry back and I don’t want to lose my prose or song writing, I just want to have my words intact. People that are photographers come to Africa and take amazing photographs, people that paint, come here and paint the most beautiful paintings, and so on. I want to write a poem that will bring tears because of the beauty it shows in life here.

Ephesians 2:10 says we are God’s “workmanship” the Greek word is poiema. As you can infer, this is the word we get our word “poem” from. Try and fit this into your head. Jesus is the Word, the Alpha and Omega, A to Z and all good and real things are brought into existence through the Lord speaking. This universe exists, because God spoke and we are what He does when He writes a poem. That is AMAZING!!! Something special can take place in a poem where the effect it has goes beyond the form and the words. There is such a valuable beauty that comes about that is so much more than you’d find in a science textbook. We are more than a humongous group of intricate molecules and body parts. We experience things that cannot be explained physiologically. Our existence goes beyond our form, that’s because we are His poem. That’s beautiful.

So as you can guess, by the end of Friday night, I had kicked aside the previous blogs and pulled out my poems. And as far as going forward, I’m sure that my words will return to me and if I feel confident with a written poem, I’ll share it with you all at some point. In the meantime, I suggest you find a book of poetry and watch the effect the words have on you. The Lord gave us art and it is one of His most special creations. We are blessed to partake. I’ll give you a freebie and get you into the poetic swing of things…

Excerpt from “The Eternal Goodness” by John Greenleaf Whittier

The wrong that pains my soul below

I dare not throne above,

I know not of His hate, - I know

His goodness and His love

I dimly guess from blessings known

Of greater out of sight,

And, with the chastened Psalmist, own

His judgments too are right

I long for household voices gone,

For vanished smiles I long,

But God hath led my dear ones on,

And He can do no wrong

I know not what the future hath

Of marvel or surprise

Assured alone that life and death

His mercy underlies.

And if my heart and flesh are weak

To bear an untried pain,

The bruised reed He will not break,

But strengthen and sustain.

No offering of my own I have,

Nor works my faith to prove;

I can but give the gifts He gave

And plead His love for love.

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The Rundown: Speaking of writing, I just got published. My first article written as Education Director was just put out in the newsletter this week, kind of. I really love writing, as you know. Apparently Rita really loves editing. I wrote that article in Victory Magazine, mostly. After I read the published version, I was like “Wow, I sound like Rita.” Lydia, Jodie and I had a good laugh about it and they said she’s been doing that for years. Hamna shida. She wants like that dramatic, adventure writing and I just want to chill, be real and crack self-effacing jokes about eating oatmeal in my underwear. Its all good, just difference in style and I‘m pleased with the article. Life is good. The past couple days have been really nice, a little slower and I’m keeping up with stuff. I’m still trying to figure out the programs somewhat, but the preschool is just about right where I want it. This coming Wednesday, I am going to lead worship at my home group (weird we don’t call it a life group), so I’m looking forward to that. Today was the Kilimanjaro marathon. I went down there and checked it out. My church was supposed be doing evangelism, but I couldn't find them. Several of the kids, including Awadhi, have malaria so you can be praying for them and I myself have a bit of a sore throat, but I'm hoping that's all it is. I’ve been doing research for the ESL stuff, so hopefully that will fit in a little better. Its just hard, because all the kids are at different levels and their schedules seem so random. Continue to pray as I try and figure it all out. Yeah, that’s life.